Zombie Attack

I was talking with a friend of mine earlier this week and he asked me what the deal with zombies was.  And that was a good question – I don’t think I recognized how much zombies enter into my blog posts until he said that, but I figured it was worth looking into.

Let me be clear – I have no obsession with zombies.  I would be totally hip to never having to endure the zombie apocalypse, although if you turn into a zombie I’m going to pretend there’s a sign on your head that says “be kind – double tap” and go to town with whatever firearm (or bat or chainsaw) is handy.  Kind of like these people.

The reason zombies enter my blog posts more often than they should (Google “Paul Gillespie zombie” and tell me how many hits you get … EXACTLY) is apparently because I’m normal.  At least according to this article from CNN, anyway – my friends and family may dispute that particular statement.  I guess it has to do with zombies being kind of like humans but not really, so ultimately our brains freak out and can’t process things like they want to and so we end up creeped out.  (I’m not sure what that says for people who direct zombie films, but whatever)   I mean, take a look at that photo above and tell me that doesn’t creep you out – it’s a zombie Sam looking at you, staring into your very soul wondering whether your brains really do taste like chicken.  And he’s only six – the older zombies all know the chicken thing is just a ruse.  Tell me that doesn’t creep you out.

And if it wasn’t enough that the threat of the zombie apocalypse exists (if the government is denying it you know it’s real), you have people inhaling bath salts to pretend they’re zombies.  If you’re considering that move let me suggest you do the KC Zombie Walk For Hunger instead – less life-altering, and if you decide being one of the hordes of undead isn’t your thing then you can return to normal life much easier than if you’re brainless or have a bullet in your head.

All that being said, there are probably worse things than zombies to do blog posts on.

Like clowns.

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What do you think?